THE TAO TE CHING - VERSE 7

The public domain book I found out on Kindle about the Tao interprets the 7th verse as:  Heaven is long-enduring and earth continues long. The reason why heaven and earth are able to endure and continue thus long is because they do not live of, or for, themselves. This is how they are able to continue and endure. 2. Therefore the sage puts his own person last, and yet it is found in the foremost place; he treats his person as if it were foreign to him, and yet that person is preserved. Is it not because he has no personal and private ends, that therefore such ends are realised?

Stephen Mitchell’s interpretation is similar.  The Tao is infinite, eternal. Why is it eternal? It was never born; thus it can never die. Why is it infinite? It has no desires for itself; thus it is present for all beings. The Master stays behind; that is why she is ahead. She is detached from all things; that is why she is one with them. Because she has let go of herself, she is perfectly fulfilled.

When reading through all the material on the 7th verse the idea that the Tao endures because it puts its own person last caused me a bit of heartburn at first, reminding me of the martyrdom ideas I had listened to as a child growing up in the Catholic religion.  But as I delved deeper I heard another word resonate with me as it did the first time I heard it at an Alanon meeting.  Detachment.

In Alanon, the support group created to help friends and families of alcoholics, they speak of the concept of detachment with love.  They teach the family members of alcoholics to let go of the responsibility for another person’s actions.  When someone grows up with or lives with an alcoholic he or she gets caught up in the notion that they can help the alcoholic get better.  Thus they blur the boundary between themselves and the other person and are constantly trying to change the exterior environment to keep the alcoholic from drinking again.  What I learned as a member of Alanon was how to love my alcoholic but not be responsible for him.  Then I became a counselor and realized this is not a phenomenon earmarked for just the alcoholic family.  So many people have been erroneously taught as children that they are responsible for everyone else’s happiness.   It’s a cultural concept of socialization to be nice and not make waves but in our society we seem to take it further to mean that we have to sacrifice our own happiness in order to help someone become happy.   Yet another truth I learned as a counselor is that I cannot “make” another person happy.  Only they can.  So if I spend all my time and energy trying to figure out what I must do in order to make someone feel better, I’m actually just spinning my wheels.  It was as I grasped the concept of each person having to choose their happiness for themselves that I began to grasp the concept of detachment, not just detachment from other people but from everything outside me.  For it is only by changing my own attitude about everything and everyone that I can truly be happy. 

This is what I believe the Tao is saying here.   In Byron Katie’s interpretation of this verse she wrote, “She is detached from all things in the sense that when they come, that’s what she wants, and when they go, that’s what she wants. It’s all fine with her. She is in love with it as it comes and goes.”  What an incredible concept this is.  Instead of me trying to figure out what I want, I just wait to see what comes and change my attitude to be grateful and happy for what is.  That is true detachment.  It reminds me of how Jesus kept saying he was not “of the world.”  That is what true detachment with love is all about.  In this time space reality we have learned to attach to people and things as if who we are is the most important thing in life.  Yet true happiness, at least for me, has come when I realized that nothing in this world is more important than my connection to Source, who is not “of this world.”  I know this sounds circular and yet in a way it’s not.  The truth for me is that when I step outside this illusion and remember that I am a spiritual being having a human experience then the only way to happiness is to live in the illusion yet be detached from the illusion.

So here is my quest for the week.  To step outside the illusion as much as my awareness allows me and remember that although I can enjoy everything and everyone in my life I don’t have to become defined by it, nor will I be destroyed if the possessions or the persons disappear tomorrow.  This task is much easier said than done.  But as with the Tao, if I can master just being a “witness to life,” I will endure.

Happy detachment everyone!

References:

Mitchell, Stephen (2009-10-13). Tao Te Ching. Harper Collins, Inc.. Kindle Edition.

The Laozi (2009-10-04). The Tao Teh King, or the Tao and its Characteristics. Public Domain Books. Kindle Edition.

Mitchell, Stephen; Katie, Byron (2007-02-06). A Thousand Names for Joy: Living in Harmony with the Way Things Are. Random House, Inc.. Kindle Edition.

Dyer, Wayne Dr. 1 Change Your Thoughts, Change Your Life, Audio Version, (Disc 1)

THE TAO TE CHING - VERSE 6

“The spirit that never dies is called the mysterious feminine.  Although she becomes the whole universe, her immaculate purity is never lost.  Although she assumes countless forms, her true identity remains intact.  The gateway to the mysterious female is called the root of creation.  Listen to her voice, hear it echo through creation.  Without fail, she reveals her presence.  Without fail, she brings us to our own perfection.  Although it is invisible, it endures; it will never end.”

            This sixth verse for me is a reminder of the Divine Feminine which flows through all of us.  Through Her we are always “birthing,” whether we are conscious of it or not.  I’ve been sick the past few days with a cold, so I’ve been creating all kinds of yucky things in my body to try to kill the virus that has invaded me.  The yuckiness is working.  But beyond the snot in my nose, the Divine Feminine in partnership with me is always creating this uniqueness known as Sarah’s body.  Every second of every day new cells split and multiply and die off.  According to science, we create a new body every 7 years.  It is the Divine Feminine spoken in the Tao that allows us to co-create these new bodies.   And beyond the physical this Divine Spirit within is in constant creative mode.  And in the many, many years I have been alive I have created, with Her help, a uniqueness known as Sarah. 

            So just what is this uniqueness She and I have created?  Well, off the top of my head I would say Sarah is a free spirit, an outside-the-box thinker, an adventurer, a lover, and a giver (sounds like the beginning of a great song doesn’t it).  But what do all those characteristics really mean?  Up until a few years ago, before my husband died, I’d have said I was trying to create a unique me who others would look at and think, “Wow, she’s got her shit together.”  But when someone dies too soon it reminds us that life as we know it here in this body, on this earth, is short and if we spend all our time trying to look like we have “our shit together” as defined by someone else, we miss the best part of who we are and why we’re here.  That’s why for me, Gary’s death was a wakeup call, reminding me to reach beyond what I thought others would call “shit together” and create my own definition.  So I went in search of the real me, the unique girl/woman named Sarah Elizabeth Doyle, who was more than that tiny baby born the youngest of seven children to a couple named Louise and Jim Doyle in a small town in southern Indiana. 

            Now, 6.5 years after Gary’s death, the “real me” is what you see...most of the time.  Oh my ego still tries to get in my way by criticizing me for not being what she thinks I should be or what she thinks society wants me to be. Yet luckily the “true” me has grown stronger than my judgmental ego and is more often than not the co-creation you see projecting out into the world.  How do I stay true to the genuine article?  By forgiving myself every day for being human.  By meditating every morning to touch the Source who inspires my very being.  By reading spiritual books and hanging out with spiritual people who remind me to look beyond the illusions to what is important in this world.  By setting reminders throughout the day to come back into the moment so I can reach through the silence, beyond my emotions and thoughts, and touch the Spirit of Truth. 

            This Divine Feminine that Lao Tzu called the Tao allows me to be in touch with the uniqueness called Sarah.  It is through this Divine Feminine that I can daydream, imagine, create and be whoever my heart and soul want me to be.  She is the creative arm of Source, or God, or whatever you want to call the wholeness of creation.  She is the Divine Mother of all and I am forever grateful that She is the spirit inside of me.  For in each moment I can go inside and I will Her there “without fail.”

            So as Wayne Dyer says, “Do the Tao now.”  As I live each moment with fullness I tap into this Divine Feminine energy and co-create this uniqueness called me.  And I love who me is becoming.  Ain’t life grand!

References:

Mitchell, Stephen (2009-10-13). Tao Te Ching. Harper Collins, Inc.. Kindle Edition.

The Laozi (2009-10-04). The Tao Teh King, or the Tao and its Characteristics. Public Domain Books. Kindle Edition.

Mitchell, Stephen; Katie, Byron (2007-02-06). A Thousand Names for Joy: Living in Harmony with the Way Things Are. Random House, Inc.. Kindle Edition.

Dyer, Wayne Dr. 1 Change Your Thoughts, Change Your Life, Audio Version, (Disc 1)

The TAO TE CHING - VERSE 5

Stephen Mitchell's interpretation of the Tao Te Ching: Tao doesn’t take sides; it gives birth to both good and evil. The Master doesn’t take sides; she welcomes both saints and sinners. The Tao is like a bellows: it is empty yet infinitely capable. The more you use it, the more it produces; the more you talk of it, the less you understand. Hold on to the center.

Lao-tsu: 5. 1. Heaven and earth do not act from (the impulse of) any wish to be benevolent; they deal with all things as the dogs of grass are dealt with. The sages do not act from (any wish to be) benevolent; they deal with the people as the dogs of grass are dealt with. 2. May not the space between heaven and earth be compared to a bellows?

Wayne Dyer's interpretation: Heaven and earth are impartial; they see the 10,000 things as straw dogs. The sage is not sentimental; he treats all his people as straw dogs. The sage is like heaven and earth: to him none are especially dear, nor is there anyone he disfavors. He gives and gives, without condition, offering his treasures to everyone. Between heaven and earth is a space like a bellows; empty and inexhaustible, the more it is used, the more it produces. Hold on to the center, Man was made to sit quietly and find the truth within.

Byron Katie's interpretation: The Tao doesn’t take sides; it gives birth to both good and evil.

This week I thought for sure I'd have some serious discussion about judgment and not taking sides, about unconditional love & how important it is to accept everyone as they are. Then I sat down on the airplane today with a very loud man behind me who was getting on my nerves. My internal critics were working overtime as he grew louder and louder. And to make matters worse I couldn't drown him out with music because the flight attendant had just told us to put all electronic devices away. Talk about some serious issue with judgment, I thought. Then I read this passage from Byron Katie's interpretation of the Tao, "The Master can't take sides. She's in love with reality and reality includes everything." All at once I realized this verse of the Tao, for me anyway, really had nothing to do with judging a person or an object or even a situation, it has to do with being present, in the moment, no matter what comes my way.

I get it!

Just letting things be, going with the flow, finding the vibrational match to the moment is about something far greater than letting go of the critic, it’s about finding joy in EVERYTHING…even the loud man behind me. Not because he is pleasant or unpleasant, or because I have to love everyone or everything, or even to show unconditional love, but because every moment in time is a precious gift from the Creator and will never come this way again. So after I read the verse from Byran Katie, I chuckled, looked out the window at the magnificent clouds passing beneath us and relished that specific moment, loud man and all, until I was able to pop my earbuds into my ears and relish Rimsky-Korsakov's Scheherazade.

So my goal for this week is to keep enjoying every moment in time, no matter what is happening in that moment, for there's only one unique moment like this coming our way and it's just too, too precious to intentionally miss. Thank you Source! 

See you next week.

References:

Mitchell, Stephen (2009-10-13). Tao Te Ching (p. 6). Harper Collins, Inc.. Kindle Edition.

The Laozi (2009-10-04). The Tao Teh King, or the Tao and its Characteristics (Kindle Locations 29-30). Public Domain Books. Kindle Edition.

Mitchell, Stephen; Katie, Byron (2007-02-06). A Thousand Names for Joy: Living in Harmony with the Way Things Are (p. 13). Random House, Inc.. Kindle Edition.

Dyer, Wayne Dr. 1 Change Your Thoughts, Change Your Life, Audio Version, (Disc 1)