Lately I've been worrying about my dog. She's old (somewhere around 14) and she is retiring to a farm in Texas in 2 weeks because my schedule and living situation is becoming too difficult for her old body to handle. So part of me is worrying about how she will deal with not having me around all the time, although she is going to live with one of my dearest friends, someone who is a much better mother than I will ever be. Part of me is feeling guilty that I am abandoning her in her old age. But all this worrying and guilt is doing me little good. For I'm having trouble sleeping and I'm feeling weighted down by this change in my life. So yesterday, I walked the new labyrinth in the churchyard after service to help me with my sadness and guilt. As I slowly moved along the path I asked Source Of All That Is for guidance about my heavy heart. In the center of this particular labyrinth is a statue of St. Francis of Assisi. How appropriate. For he is the patron saint of animals. When I reached the middle I stopped for a moment and listened. This true animal lover told me to let go of Sharmin. Let her move on to her next phase in life for she will make her own decisions about how she will feel and how she will be. Not me. He said she was grateful for the love I had provided her all these years and that if I too remember my gratitude for the time I've had with my furry friend, that I will be able to peacefully allow her to now share her unconditional love with another human friend. He said if I let go I will feel the "rightness" of this situation and that it is meant to be. "Let go," I kept hearing in my head. "Let go." As I walked out of the labyrinth, I gave thanks to the Creator of the Universe for the wisdom imparted to me and for the 13 years of joy I have received from this beautiful animal. Since that walking meditation yesterday I have found a new sense of peace in this whole situation. And although I still shed tears of sadness, they are mixed with the tears of joy for the memories I will always carry with me of one of my bestest friends. Now I will stay in the moments with this sweet animal for as long as she is with me and I will truly appreciate her for what she is to me, a blessing from God.
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