HAPPY HALLOWEEN

    I've heard the legends and stories about this holiday a couple of times before but today I thought I'd refresh my memory on where Halloween originated. Hallow meant sanctify in old English and many Christian religious traditions observe November 1st as All Hallows (now often called All Saints Day). Pope Boniface IV in the 7th century, believed that the best way to convert pagans was to supplant their pagan holidays with Christian ones so they created All Hallows on May 13th, as a day to celebrate all the saints and to replace the Roman pagan festival of the dead that was celebrated on February 21st, the end of the Roman year. Later another pope moved the date to November 1st to coincide with the Druid fire festival called "Samhain" (pronounced sow-een).

    The Druids were the high priests, scientists and poets of the Celtic culture (Ireland, Scotland & Wales) and the Celts called this celebration of the fire festival, Hallowe'en to honor the dead at the close of harvest and the beginning of winter (which back then was considered to last until May). Winter was also considered the time when faeries were most active. This belief evolved over time into the belief that it was the day when ghosts were able to mingle with the living. Even though the Roman Catholic Church tried to change the holiday to more honor the saints than the pagan beliefs, the Celts continued to celebrate it as the time when the dead and the supernatural wandered the earth.

    The tradition of trick or treating came from the custom of setting out gifts of food and drink to ward off the evil spirits. Over time, people began dressing up like these creatures and went "mumming" to obtain the food and drink. In England, soul cakes were placed outside the doors and people went "a'soulin." Other customs of the Samhain festival that continue to this day are bobbing for apples and drinking spiced cider.

    The Jack-o-lantern originated from a myth about a man named Stingy Jack who tricked the devil into agreeing he wouldn't go to hell when he died. After his death, heaven wouldn't let him in because he was too evil so he asked the devil to let him into hell. But the devil had to keep his promise so Stingy Jack had nowhere to go. The devil threw him an ember from the fires of hell to light his way as he wandered the world searching for a final resting place. Since Stingy Jack was always stealing turnips from the fields, he placed the ember into a carved out turnip and turned it into a lantern. It was the Irish who then started the custom of carving various vegetables (especially gourds) and placing them outside their doors to keep Stingy Jack from coming to their place on Hallow E'en. After they immigrated to America they realized pumpkins were much easier to carve and thus the modern custom began.

    Isn't it amazing how many customs and cultures were involved in the creation of this now very fun holiday. Tonight, I will don some outfit (nothing elaborate mind you) and head out to a party with friends. Now that I know the origins of this holiday I will offer food and drink to those I meet along the way, just in case they might be an evil spirit. Stay safe as you head out tonight for you never know what spirit might be watching you. Enjoy!

LAUGHTER, IT'S A NATURAL HIGH

    I read the following quote by Victor Hugo this morning. "Laughter is the sun that drives the winter from the human face."

    It reminded me how much I like to laugh and how I just don't do enough of it. I believe as we move from childhood to becoming an adult we lose most of our ability to laugh and we end up taking life way too seriously. When was the last time you had a good belly laugh? For me it was last week when my cat, Cayenne, lying quietly on the window sill watching the birds in the trees outside, became frightened by something (since she can't talk I don't know what it was) and sprang straight up in the air, as if she was a cartoon, landing simultaneously on all four paws before vaulting over me to get to the floor. Then, as if nothing happened, she slowly sauntered from the room. Not only was it great acrobatics, because she didn't knock a single thing off the sill, but it was all so unexpected. My laughter peeled through the room for several minutes and when I was finished I could feel the endorphins coursing through my veins. What a natural high. But that was a week ago and although I'm sure I've chuckled somewhere in all that forgotten time, I don't often have memorable laughs, because I spend way too much time taking life too seriously.

    Voltaire said: "God is a comedian playing to an audience who is too afraid to laugh." Maybe he was right, maybe we are just too afraid to allow ourselves to laugh at all the comedy life has to offer. So where does this fear come from? It is taught. From a very early age we are told to question and self regulate ourselves and to take life more seriously. The great persona I like to call either the Judge or the Critic is notorious in all of us for sitting on our shoulders, whispering in our ears and reminding us not to make a fool of ourselves. In this country I believe it stems from the dear Puritans (remember they were run out of England because of their extremist views) whose foundation extolled the virtues of being a serious, productive member of society and that too much laughter meant one was not working hard enough. Although there is truth in being a productive member of society, I think we've taken the virtue to an extreme.

    I'm sure there are other views as to why we take life too seriously and don't laugh enough. But whatever the reason, today is a reminder that I want to laugh more. So I'm going to make a more concerted effort to do just that. First, over the next few days, I'm going to gather up things that make me laugh, whether it be cartoons (Beetle Bailey), stories (there are a million of them on the internet), TV shows (Seinfeld), or movies (Airplane). Then I'm going to get out my infamous yellow sticky pad and place LAUGH around my house to remind me to seek out laughter.

    I'd love for you to share with me your stories and laughter ideas to help me not take life so seriously. As ee cummings said, "The most wasted of all days is one without laughter." I plan not to waste another day.

YIPPEE FOR CONTRAST

    As a continuation of my discussion on contrast, this Colorado snowstorm is definitely a contrast for me. Not wanting to get out in this pretty, yet yucky weather, I tried to cancel my appointments yesterday but ended up going to the office for one client. So I donned my waterproof pants and coat and stomped out to clean 6 inches of snow off my car. Thank the heavens above for heated seats and mirrors. Then I slushed my way to work (with a side trip through Starbucks' drive-thru for a venti decaf latte, one of the finer perks of the cold weather). After my appointment I slushed home and parked my car back on the street (remember I can't get into my garage). Now this morning I may have to repeat this process unless, as I'm hoping, they close the office (they're predicting another 5-10 inches by tonight). Of course the downside to my impromptu day off is that I'm a contractor so I don't get paid if I don't work. But I prefer no money to going out in this snow.

    So what does this have to do with contrast? Well, this October snowstorm has shown me the contrast between what I don't want and what I do want. The drive to work this afternoon was my contrast as I realized enough is enough. I came to this land of 300 days of sunshine and numerous blizzards a year, because my husband was from here and he loved winter. But he's gone now, so why am I still here? The answer is because I haven't trusted in my higher power like I profess to believe. If I focus on the outcome, I'll find the answers on how to get what I want. And what do I want? I want warm weather. So somehow, someway, in the not too distant future, I'm going to morph back into a summer baby and move south again. In four weeks I will pull into Ft. Myers Beach, Florida for my three month snowbird stint. When I do I will start looking for the ways and means to make that part of the world my home and turn Colorado into my part-time spring and summer paradise. I have to trust that the answers will come.

    So I rejoice in the contrast of today's snow, for it reminds me of what I don't want and helps me focus on what I do want. If I want to live in the warm, then it's up to me to get there. Yippee for contrast!

PUTTING THE SKIDS ON THE SLIPPERY SLOPE

    Woke this morning to what sounded like my cat playing with cellophane. Turned out to be frozen precipitation blowing against my bedroom window. My first reaction was an all over body depression. Ugh, snow. Then my mind began to unravel all the reasons I hate snow. But I stopped myself. Because I've been down this slippery slope before and the only place it takes me is to my pity party where I spend hours and hours (and sometimes days and days) feeling miserable. So I took a deep breath, acknowledged the feelings invading my body and put the skids on the slippery slope. Then I chose a different route. I began counting my blessings. For I have many. I was thankful for the warm bed I was sleeping in. The furnace that kicks on when the temperature in my townhome drops below 70 degrees. The fireplace where I'm going to build my roaring fire this morning. The coffee I plan to drink lots of today.

    So why am I expounding upon all these items that have nothing to do with snow against my window? Because I believe it is our thoughts that create our feelings and we all have a choice on what we think. But I also believe it takes practice to keep from sliding down that slippery slope more than a few inches. So in case you're interested, here's how I put the skids on that slippery slope this morning. Step one: I took time to recognize what I was feeling to begin with. If I wasn't aware of the depression that was setting in over the snow I wouldn't be able to change it. Step two: I stopped the unwanted thought. I often literally say "Stop" out loud, or at least inside my head. I've told clients that if they can't stop it themselves at first, say "Sarah said to stop it," until they can. Step three: I picked a thought I wanted to replace the old one with. For me this morning, it was to create my gratitude list because that always makes me feel better. But I could also tell myself all the positive aspects of snow or pretend I was at the beach. I just have to pick any thought that makes me feel better than the one before. It doesn't have to be a thought that makes me feel joyous, any thought that makes me feel better than the original thought will move me in the right direction.

    I know this sounds easier than it is. But I've spent many years now using this technique. When I first started, I put sticky notes on my mirror and I used a watch that rang on the hour to remind me to stop and ask myself how I was feeling. Then if I didn't like my feeling, I would step through this process to change my thoughts. As I told a friend yesterday, I am now happy 98% of the time. Why? Because after years of spending maybe 50% of my time happy, I realized I like feeling happy so why not do what it takes to be happy. Today I did what it takes. I stepped through this process and it worked. So if you find yourself on the downhill side of the slippery slope today, I hope one of your choices will be to try this technique and see if you too can begin to put the skids on your downward trajectory and choose to head towards happiness instead.

SNOW IS YOUR FRIEND

This came across my weather update this morning for Denver and most of Colorado: "A major midweek winter storm is taking shape for the Rockies and the Wasatch Range later today and Wednesday, with many ski resorts and the greater Salt Lake City and Denver areas seeing the season`s first significant accumulation. Up to 8 inches of accumulation is possible."

As many of you know, I am not a winter baby, so this news does not place me on cloud nine, especially since they are working on the driveways in my complex. You see my car is parked on the street because I can't get into my garage. Nothing thrills me more (actually let's replace thrills with chills) than having to clean the snow off my car as the wind howls through my coat. But I am a believer in making the best out of any situation, so I'm going to use this news as an inspiration for writing a poem about my friend the snow.

Snow: How do I love thee let me count the ways.

    Tho' prefer you from afar, like a distant exploding star,

    In your presence I'll delight, as I give up the fight

    When you tickle my nose, and slosh 'neath my toes,

    And flake in my hair, and dance everywhere.

    So let the city shut down, and create stillness all around,

    For the tundra of your cover, chills me like no other,

    And I'll sit here by the fire, weighted down in fleece attire,

    'Cause it's hopeless to pitch a fit, and you're beautiful I must admit,

    Plus tomorrow's another day, and by the weekend you'll melt away.

    But in truth I have to say, that if Frosty's here to stay,

    I rejoice in each day, for in three weeks I go away

 

Stay warm, enjoy what life brings you and remember: Snow is your friend.

    

    

    

EVERYONE NEEDS A LITTLE WIND TO BE HAPPY

    Last night at dinner I had a long conversation with a friend who says he doesn't know any married couples who are truly happy. Upon further discussion I realized he meant that no one in a marriage is happy 100% of the time. Once I understood his premise, I had to agree with him. You see I don't believe anyone in this human experience can sustain happiness 100% of the time but we can string together enough moments of happiness to be happy most of the time. So why can't we be happy all the time? Because without some adversity, or contrast to what we want in our life, we would not grow. A perfect metaphor for this is in the book "The Art of Being" by Dennis Merritt, where he discusses the biosphere experiments where scientists created an environment that imitated earth and lived in these closed systems for several years at a time. In one of the first experiments the scientists found that trees would grow only to a certain point then fall over. Upon further investigation they found that the trees had too shallow a root system to sustain their height and weight which they then found was caused by the lack of wind in the biosphere. It seems trees need wind to stimulate their deep root growth. Wind is their adversity or contrast.

    Just as the trees need the wind to dig their roots deep into the soil, humans need adversity and contrast in order to push our roots deeper too. As with the marriage example above, couples need some adversity and contrast in order to deepen the roots of their relationship. For me looking back, the adversity and contrast in my life has helped me deepen my faith in my Higher Power. But our culture teaches us at a very early age that adversity is bad and that we should beat ourselves up if we don't have what we want (perfect career, perfect weight, perfect relationship) and that we should hope and pray to not have any adversity in our lives (although I don't know anyone who hasn't had some in their life). So today, what I'm learning is that when I feel a negative emotion, it is because I'm experiencing either an adversity or a contrast (what I don't want). So now, I'm trying to thank the contrast when it arrives for it is telling me not only what I don't want in my life and helping me focus on what I do want, it's also helping me grow my roots deeper. Because with deeper roots I can let go of my anxieties and fears a little more each day and truly enjoy the ride. That's my happiness!

Stepping out of our "delusion"

Quote from Einstein:

"A human being is part of the whole, called by us 'Universe'; a part limited in time and space. He experiences himself, his thoughts and feelings as something separated from the rest---a kind of optical delusion of his consciousness. This delusion is a kind of prison for us, restricting us to our personal desires and to affection for a few persons nearest us. Our task must be to free ourselves from this prison."

I often find myself in this delusional prison Einstein speaks of, forgetting that I am part of so much more than the flesh and blood of this body. As an example, I spent months and months and months writing a book, changing it, rewriting it, wordsmithing it and on one day a month ago I said, "Enough is enough." So I changed a few words and deemed it complete (at least until a publisher gets their hands on it). Then I gave it to a few people to read. One of them told me later that because I said the parents were whispering behind closed doors in the very first paragraph, it started the mystery and suspense and they couldn't put the book down. I laugh, because I added the word whisper on the last day at the last minute. I barely remember adding it. Yet, that one word is what made it such a success to the reader. As a writer I find that when I sit down to write, most often the creative ideas flow from a tap that is much greater than the brain that is inside my flesh and bones. I call this tap Divine Creativity (an extension of Divine Intelligence) or another name can be the creative facet of the omnipotent God who created all. It doesn't really matter what you want to call this Source, what matters is tapping into it. Getting outside our "delusion" as Einstein called it, is the ultimate task for we humans. So today, when I go to swim I am going to remind myself that the water and I come from the same Source. The people in the lanes next to me are created by the same Source, the people who run the recreation center are part of that one Source, and those people in the cars I pass or drive behind are truly, on the deepest level, one with me, for we are all extensions of Source. So let's heed Einstein's words today and step out of our delusions and re-member!

Into the 21st Centuray

Today I made a decision to start a blog. Why? Because it is time. I am a writer and what better place to write. Everyday will be something new, whether fact or fiction. It will be mine, created from my right brain with the help of my universal source and all the guides who assist me on this journey called life. I hope you will join me. Come enjoy the ride with me.